My God Story: Part 2 - My Jonah Story

I wrote about the events leading up to my wilderness years in my previous post. You can read it here. 

Today, I would like to share an interesting story. A story about wilderness, about Jonah and about a fish. 

As I shared previously, my family was not Christian. I only accepted Christ when I was in Uni. As with a lot of older generation Chinese, my parents were not pro-Christians. So, it was no surprise my mum was furious when she found out that I had "converted". 

The first time I went back home during the semester break after accepting Christ, I contemplated hiding the truth. These were the facts I was considering at the time:

I knew my mum would oppose me being a Christian. 
I knew it would be a horrible semester break if I were to tell her the truth. 
I also knew that if I kept quiet and just be like usual, she wouldn't even have guessed. 
I knew I could pray for God's forgiveness. (Surely He knows better than me how scary angry my mum could be.)

So upon landing on Kuching, I had already decided that I would only tell her when the time is right. After God had prepared her heart so that she will receive the news with grace and joy. Even if that "right time" may be years away. 

What I had neglected was the fact that my mum would always bring me to the temple to burn the incense and pay respect to the idols. 

So, just a few days after being home, to my horror, my mum told me we would go to the temple the next day. I remember entertaining the thought of just going through the ordeal - burning the incense and presenting it from one idol to another. After all, it wouldn't mean a thing to me. I'm not praying or worshipping them anymore. 

But that evening itself, I came clean with my mum. Told her everything. And explained what it would mean practically - that I could no longer follow her to the temple (not that she didn't already know it 😅). 

My confession was met with complete silence. And then super loud scolding. And all attempts of trying to scare me to just give in to her. Followed by days of silence and ignoring me. 

So, well, in short, she was not happy with me being a Christian. Of course, in the end, she had to accept the fact that there is no changing me. But deep down, I know she still could not embrace the fact that I am now a Christian. 

So, when I came back to Kuching after graduating, I was not free to attend church. She would either get angry, making it impossible for me to leave or she would allow me to go reluctantly. 

To cut the story short, I did not grow in my walk with God. I was quenched of the living water. My spirit man was in a dry, harsh desert. 

Spiritual growth aside, I did prosper in my work. Proves that God is still full of grace in spite of my disobedience. (Though in hind sight, I now know that I would have been much more blessed had I obeyed and went to Kerteh). 

So, anyway, I spent 6 years in this wilderness/ desert called Kuching. 

Until God sent a big fish to "swallow me up and spit me back" in Kerteh. A big fish in the form of my husband. 

Source: Internet

To think that I turned down the offer when I was posted to Kerteh only to date someone who was working in Kerteh (at the time). That could only have been God's hands at work. We got married while my husband was still working in Kerteh. So, naturally, I had to go to Kerteh to be with him. 

Long distance relationship was tough enough. Long distance marriage was completely out of the question. So, I moved to Kerteh right after our wedding. 

Are you marveling (or perhaps even laughing) in your heart now, like how my mum marveled? She said, "When God wants you to be in Kerteh, in the end, you still have to go there." So true right? 

I could relate to Jonah so well. I see so many parallel in myself and in his accounts. 

1. Jonah was called to go to Nineveh (Jonah 1:1-2) - I was called to go to Kerteh. 
2. Jonah refused to go to Nineveh (Jonah 1:3) - I refused to go to Kerteh. 
3. He went instead to Tarshish (Jonah 1:3) - I went instead to Kuching. 
4. He got caught in a bad storm and got thrown into the sea (Jonah 1:4-16) - I entered a spiritual desert and wilderness in Kuching. 
5. Jonah got swallowed up by the fish sent by God (Jonah 1:17) - God sent a big fish to me too, in the form of my husband. 
6. Jonah was in the fish belly 3 days and 3 nights (Jonah 1:17) - I was in my wilderness for 6 years. 
7. Jonah cried out to God (Jonah 2:1-9) - I cried out to God too. Things were so distressing in Kuching. 
8. He then got vomited on dry land (Jonah 2:10) - When I started dating my husband, I finally realized my call to go to Kerteh. 
9. Jonah was then called again to go to Nineveh (Jonah 3:1-2) - I was given a 2nd opportunity to go to Kerteh. This time, not alone anymore. 
10. Jonah finally obeyed and go and do (Jonah 3:3-4) - I finally moved to Kerteh. 
11. When Jonah obeyed, wondrous things happened (Jonah 3:5-10) - For Jonah, the people of Nineveh repented and turned to God. For me, my spiritual growth started in Kerteh.  

I never tire from telling people my Jonah story. For me, it teaches and signifies these things:

1. God is patient, tolerant and faithful towards us.

Jonah was disobedient, so was I. But God dealt patiently with Jonah. God dealt graciously with me. 

If you don't agree, if you think God is angry and ever ready to punish any disobedience, read Jonah 4. Read the conversations between Jonah and God. You won't believe the level of patience God showed (and the level of daringness portrayed by Jonah!) 

In spite of my rebellion, He blesses me with a good husband who He also used to bring me to where I was meant to be. In short, He addressed all my earlier worries about Kerteh and made it easier for me to go. You can't tell me my God is not a good Father! 

2. God's plan cannot be thwarted. 

Jonah's disobedience (and mine) did not stop God's ultimate plan. I am firm believer that God's will could be delayed or hindered for a time, but it could not be thwarted. 

I understand there may be exceptions but I am a good example - After all those years, I still had to go to where I was to be in the first place. I didn't find myself a husband in Kuching, got married and settled down. A big fish came to me. 

Also, let's pause for a moment and consider Esther's story. 

For if you remain completely silent at this time, relief and deliverance will arise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father’s house will perish. Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14) 

We have no idea of speculating but who knows if God will send someone else if Jonah remains disobedient till the end?  

3. God will still bless you in the wilderness but that is only second best. 

Because He is our good Father, because He loves us, He will still bless us in the wilderness. I was not in any lack materially while in Kuching. As God provided for everything that the Israelites needed in the wilderness, God provided for me. 

But anything that is not God's promise is only second best. 

How can the wilderness ever compare to the land flowing with milk and honey? 

4. Obey God. For your own sake.  

Obey God, every single time. Any struggle, any reluctance or any delay will only be to your own disadvantage. 

When I went to Kerteh, I met so many great men and women of God. 

When Joseph was looking for his brothers, a certain man pointed Joseph to his brothers, which resulted in him being sold to Egypt and from thereon, fulfilling his purpose (Gen 37:14-16). Similarly, I had many "certain man" in Kerteh who pointed me to my spiritual growth. 

5. Obey God. For others' sake as well. 

When Jonah went to Nineveh, the people of Nineveh were saved. 

Every 1 day of Jonah's disobedience is a day in sin for the people of Nineveh. 

When God calls you to something, remember that there are others who are impacted at the other side of your obedience (or disobedience).

6. Obey immediately. 

This one is simple - obey immediately. 

After all the points I've laid out above, why would we want to take our sweet time and slowly act on God's call, right? Won't you want to obey and respond immediately? 

My Jonah story lesson has been this - obey immediately. The sooner you enter into God's calling for you, the sooner you can reap the blessings and promises. 

Although I did say that God may still bless you when you're in the wilderness, but I also emphasized that that is only the 2nd best. 

Having said that, another way to look at it is that even if you're prospering and doing well by earthly standards, it does not mean you are in the promised land. 

God's will for us is to prosper us and bless us abundantly in all areas of our life - spirit, soul and body, that we in turn can be a channel of blessing to those around us. 

Beloved ones in Christ,

1. Are you in a season of wilderness? Or perhaps you have exited the wilderness? 
2. Do you have a similar Jonah story? Did you go/ do in the end? Or did you choose to keep to your original decision? 

My going to Nineveh (Kerteh) was 10 years ago. There was no way of knowing how things will be if I had made a different decision and obeyed and went to Kerteh 16 years ago. And there is no point in dwelling on the "if". 

There is also no point in asking if I regretted my first decision. I know, without a doubt, that my walk with God now would have been stronger and deeper had I went to Kerteh 6 years earlier. But by God's grace, that season was not a complete waste. 

The fact that I'm sharing this story and you're reading it is solid prove that God redeems all our imperfections. 

I bless the Lord for all His benefits towards me. He redeems my life from destruction. He crowns me with lovingkindness and tender mercies. He did not deal with me according to my sins and iniquities. 

Psalm 103:1-1-10 

Bless the Lord, O my soul;
And all that is within me, bless His holy name!

Bless the Lord, O my soul,
And forget not all His benefits:
Who forgives all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases,
Who redeems your life from destruction,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,
Who satisfies your mouth with good things,
So that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

The Lord executes righteousness
And justice for all who are oppressed.
He made known His ways to Moses,
His acts to the children of Israel.
The Lord is merciful and gracious,
Slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.
He will not always strive with us,
Nor will He keep His anger forever.
He has not dealt with us according to our sins,
Nor punished us according to our iniquities.