My God Story: Part 5.2 - The Man Born Blind

In the early years after Daniel's diagnosis with the genetic condition, Prader-Willi Syndrome (PWS), two stories from the gospel captivated me.

One is the story of Jesus giving sight to the man born blind in John 9. The other is of Jesus healing the boy with a mute spirit in Mark 9. 

Today, I would like to reflect on the story from John 9. 

John 9:1-38 records the account of Jesus healing a blind man by making mud with His saliva and instructing him to go wash in a pool.  

This was a man who was blind from birth. Who could not see from the moment he was born. 

Just as the genes in the chromosome 15 were not functioning (silenced) when Daniel was born. 

It is a story that I can relate to. And there is this question in the story that gripped my heart because it is a question I myself asked. The disciples' question in John 9:2 "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?". 

Those years, every time I would read or think of this verse, I would hear this other question ringing in my mind instead - 'God, who sinned, Daniel or us, that he was born with a genetic disorder?'

And although Jesus' answer to the disciples 'Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but that the works of God should be revealed in him' should have offered me some comfort, strangely it didn't. 

Outwardly, I told myself - Neither my son nor we, the parents, sinned. But that the works of God should be revealed in him. Daniel's life will bring glory to God. 

Yet inwardly, subconsciously, I hadn't wholly believed it. 

Well, this was a time when I have not yet unveiled the true meaning of salvation. What it truly means to be saved, to be in Christ. 

I feel ashamed to admit this but the truth is that, all those years, I had been seeing my God as a God who barter trades with His children - His good gifts in exchange with our obedience and right living. His punishment and discipline in exchange for our sins and wrong living. 

And I see Christianity as this high calling to live right and God-pleasing, perfect and holy and righteous because God is perfect, holy and righteous. Needless to say, I felt that I had fallen short of whatever God is requiring of me. 

So, for a long time, I had subconsciously believed that I had (somehow, indirectly, unknowingly) contributed to Daniel's condition. Whatever it was, I must have displeased my Father. Otherwise, why would this happen? Whatever it was, I needed to learn the lesson that my Father wants me to learn and to grow. Whatever it was, there is something I needed to do/ to do more/ to do less/ to stop doing. 

You know much like the branches being pruned? I had held onto the idea (and the guilt and condemnation) that I had impurities that needed to be pruned so that I can grow in my walk with God and bear fruit. These impurities requires me to be pruned. And having a special needs child was my pruning. 

So I had interpreted John 9:3 as such, 'The parents (or the man) have sin in their (his) life. But in the end, the works of God would be revealed in him.'

I wrote about the season in my life where I had thought that I was going through the refiner's fire. Maybe there is truth in that I was being refined and had grown in my walk with God because of this trial that I was walking in. 

But I now know that my view of my Abba Father as a dad who is ever ready to discipline His children so that we can be made pure and be conformed to His image could not be more wrong. 

I am a beloved daughter who is so loved and cherished by my Father, forgiven and cleansed and made whole and righteous. 

That is not to say that He doesn't discipline and correct me. But there is something that I was ignorant to in that season of my life - that my being made pure and conformed to His image is not something I am still trying to attain through trials. It is something that I already am, that I already have, in Christ. 

And my view of Christianity as this religion which calls us and enables us to live a righteous, godly living through God's pruning, through enduring hardships and trials and through giving God glory in the midst of our struggles is completely twisted (despite it being a popular teaching and belief)! Not to mention, funny. 

Yes, of course we are to still give thanks to God and glorify Him, while continuing to abide in Him in the face of hardship. But our Christian living is already a righteous victorious God glorifying one in Christ (in spite of any circumstance that you may be in)! 

Read again carefully what Jesus said about the branches in John 15. The Holy Spirit has recently given me a much needed revelation as I was reading the book of John - you are already clean. 

Ps Ashok RK wrote this in his article Spiritual Warfare Facts: spiritual warfare is nothing but the devil’s attempt to draw us out of our position in Christ so that he can bring death in some form to us. 

It gave me an insight to what it meant to every other aspects of our lives as well, beyond the context of spiritual warfare. 

We should be careful not to allow anything to draw us out of our position in Christ. Be it spiritual attacks, trials, temptations, cares of this world or even just mundane daily life. 

Finally, after all these years, I heard and accepted Jesus' words as He had said it - Neither the boy nor his parents sinned, but that the works of God might be revealed in him. 

Source: Internet