The T in PBT - Timothy?

I wrote about my apostle Paul here. 

Although I had never fully recognised his role as my apostle Paul until quite recently, I had always know that he was discipling me. 

There were many occasions where what he taught/ spoke/ shared with me sparked a light or resonated greatly in my spirit man. We have also came to realise another thing - often, we have quite similar view in areas of things of God. 

And I found myself repeating this, 'I am, after all, your disciple.' 

But more than just that, I've also realised that, as I abide myself under this discipleship and continue to grow in the Lord, my hunger and ability to grasp the deep things of God increased. 

Just taking one example in the area of the writings of mighty men of God. My apostle Paul recommended teachings and writings of great man of God, such as John G Lake and Smith Wigglesworth, to me back when my family was still in Kerteh. (In fact, he has never stopped introducing and recommending great reads and great teachings to me.) But my spirit man was not ready for it then.  

I bought the books and attempted to read them. But instead of feeling that it has ignited something inside of me (which it totally should!), I had read those books with a sense of condemnation and unworthiness and, well, a strong sense that what was written was not for me. That it was un-achievable for me. 

That those were just words on a page, to be written and read, but never to be lived out.

I never even reached half way into those books. 😂

Those books remained a pretty deco item on my book shelf for many years. From Kerteh to KK, they remained there. 🙈

It was only after I had my breakthrough that I was able to receive and appropriate the revelations and teachings imparted to me. And then, one fine day, I was prompted to pick up John Lake again. And this time round, I don't know how else to describe what happened better but to simply put it this way - something came alive inside of me as I read it. 

What I am trying to say is essentially this - When God places Paul in your life, you need to be ready and glad to be a Timothy. And being a Timothy is a journey. Discipleship is a journey. 

Like the cartoon character in my children's show would say: If, at first, you don't get it. Try and try again. 😂

You have to understand that the apostle Paul is on another league of his own. His revelation and union and communion with God is a whole different level altogether. And his role is to teach, guide, admonish, correct and propel you deeper and further into the things of God. 

As Timothy, your role is to observe and learn. And to aspire to be an apostle Paul. 

I guess I have to say that I wasn't exactly a great Timothy in the beginning. I was hungry for God, yes, but I had so many baggages and burdens and issues clogging up my spiritual food intake. Worst of all, I was both unaware of them and unwilling to resolve and clear them up, at the same time. That hindered my growth in the Lord. 

But praise be to God, it is not the end of the story. God can redeem and restore any broken story, if and when you give it to Him. 

I am living proof that God does that. He redeemed and restored me. And I can say (without being prideful) that I am a bettter Timothy today than I used to be. 

Now, I know some of you may be anticipating me to write about my own Timothys. After all, I have written about my Paul and my Barnabases - who they are and my story with them, right?

Bet you did not foresee me writing about myself as Timothy. I had not planned to write this too, actually. 

You see, my original plan was to write about, how I have not found my Timothy and that I would love to have Timothy. Not because I think that I am fit to be a Paul to anyone, but simply because everyone needs to know of God's goodness and to enter into the fullness of God that Christ has came to give us. 

Whatever revelations of the things of God that I have glimpsed or have received and appropriated, I want others to have them too. (Which is why I am constantly talking and blogging about God stories.) The desire that everyone experiences this goodness and fullness of God fuels the me. 

So, of course, I pray for a Timothy. Yet, I don't know if God has placed Timothy in my life. Or maybe God has intended my children to be my Timothys - you know, as a mother, train up a child in the way he should go (Prov 22:6). 

Whatever and however that is, for now, I don't and won't fret about it. 

But even as I started writing, I felt the Holy Spirit showing me that, whether or not we have Paul in our life, we all need to have the heart and spirit of Timothy. 

I'll give one example of what is being said of Timothy in the Bible. But you can search him out for more. 

For this reason I have sent Timothy to you, who is my beloved and faithful son in the Lord, who will remind you of my ways in Christ, as I teach everywhere in every church. (1 Cor 4:17)

Source: Internet

Read 1 Cor 4 to find out what is this 'for this reason' that the apostle Paul has sent Timothy. See how the apostle Paul describes Timothy - beloved and faithful son in the Lord and remind others of Paul's ways in Christ. 

He abides under the discipleship, he appreciates it, he learns, he receives, he appropriates. And in turn, he imparts. How else was Timothy able to remind others of Paul's ways in Christ, if he had not first received and appropriated them? 

Paul's ways in Christ have become his ways in Christ. 

Timothy has to humble himself, empty himself, recognise the things that Paul can disciple him on (and hunger for it) and then receive and enter into his fullness in Christ. 

So, my question today, beloved in Christ, is not whether you have a Timothy to disciple.

But are you a Timothy? 

And if you haven't already noticed from my story, being a Timothy is a journey. A beautiful journey with a beautiful fruit. 

Beloved in Christ, I pray for you as I would pray for myself - to be a good Timothy under our Paul(s) and enter into our inheritance in the fullness of God.